


What Make's A Real Dad

by PopcornDonuts



Category: iCarly
Genre: Family, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-06-01
Updated: 2012-06-27
Packaged: 2013-06-14 16:02:07
Rating: T
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,304
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8171966/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2532138/PopcornDonuts
Summary: his blood may not be flowing through my veins, his DNA may not make up half of me, but what does that matter when it comes to who cared most.





	1. Chapter 1: Goodbye Daddy

I was only 5 but that didn't mean I wasn't aware of anything, or that I didn't remember what happened. I'd been playing with my dollies downstairs while mom and dad argued upstairs, it wasn't a rare occurrence, they always argued. But the shouting was getting louder and louder and there was banging and I'm pretty sure a sound of something breaking. It scared me, but mom had always told me that when she and dad argued I had to stay downstairs and be a good girl.

The shouting suddenly stopped before mom came down stairs, she was carrying two bags and my pair of red shoes in her hand.

"Hey baby girl, be a good girl and put on your shoes while I go get your coat!" she told me, handing over my shoes as she went over to the stand we kept the coats on, dad came down the stairs at this point.

"Where exactly do you think you're going to go like?" he asked, in that calm tone of his, mom had already handed me the coat and told me to take two of my dollies, my favourite two.

"Anywhere is better than here!" mom told dad once I'd picked my bridal Barbie and my Rapunzal Barbie, she took my hand and headed for the front door.

"You'll come back, you always do! Remember that Sam." where the last words I heard dad say. He was right, mom would often leave whenever she and dad had a fight, and then return a few hours later, but she'd never taken me with her and I was sure that wasn't a good sign.

I didn't know where mom was taking us, she didn't talk to grandma so that was out the question, and she didn't have any friends which I knew of because daddy always said she didn't have time for friends. I knew mommy had a few from school, but we only ever saw them at Christmas, and sometimes birthdays so I think they live away away. I didn't want to ask in case in caused mommy to get upset or angry, so I stayed silent as I sat in the front seat and hugged my Barbie's.

Eventually we pulled up outside and apartment building I'd never seen before, mommy got out the car before coming round to my side to unfasten me. She took my hand once I was safely out the car and directed me into the apartment building; I began to get nervous because I didn't know where we were going, plus I'd left my Barbie's in the car so I couldn't hug them for security.

Mom stopped at a door with the number 8 written on it and knocked, this was followed by a long pause like there was uncertainty on what would happen next. But after what seemed like forever the sound of a lock was heard and the door opened, stood behind it was none other than…

"Uncle Freddie!" I cried excitedly, letting go of mom's hand and running into his already open arms for a hug. We never saw Uncle Freddie much because daddy didn't like him, we only saw him at Christmas, and usually dad didn't like me going anywhere near him. Although I do remember one year when dad was unable to make it and Uncle Freddie spent ages playing games with me.

"Hey there sweetie, haven't you grown into a big girl since I last saw you!" he exclaimed, tickling my tummy as he placed me safely onto his hip before looking at mommy, I wasn't stupid, I knew he'd want to know why we were at his apartment.

"I left him!" mom whispered, she looked like she was going to cry and I didn't like seeing this, so I buried my head into Freddie's shoulder. I heard a few whispers but I wasn't able to work out what they were saying, next thing Freddie was walking and I lifted my head from my shoulder but was unable to see my mom anywhere and therefore couldn't stop the tears rolling down my cheeks. I trusted Freddie but I didn't want my mommy to leave me with him.

"Hey what's up?" Freddie asked me, moving me ever so slightly so he could see my face but so I was still on his hip.

"M-mo-mommy!" I managed to get out, I was now crying heavily, I don't know why because I knew mommy would come back, she always came back.

"Aw don't cry sweetie, mommy's coming back she just went to get the bags from the car." Freddie told me, wiping away my tears from my face with his hand. I nodded my head, my tears subsiding, despite me not knowing Freddie much I had the feeling that I got around my mom, knowing that I'd always be safe and so harm could come to me; I wish I had that feeling when daddy held me or give me hug.

"Now, when mommy gets back Uncle Freddie has to have a talk with her, but I've got some Disney movies from when I babysit my cousin. Would you like to watch one? or do something else you enjoy!" he told me with a smile.

"Do you have the little mermaid?" I asked timidly, I suddenly was very aware that I'd just cried in front of him and he was practically a complete stranger.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure Eve use to like that one best!" he told me, carrying me over to the DVD cabinet; he opened it but I was no longer paying attention, my eyes were fixed on the soft brown teddy bear that sat on top of the cabinet. Freddie followed my gaze once he'd picked out the DVD.

"You like Rupert Bear?" he asked me and I nodded my small head, my eyes never leaving the bear.

"Well here you go, you can cuddle him while you watch the movie if you like!" he told me, reaching for the bear and handing it too me, I held it to my chest a smile developing on my face as I put it into the soft fur.

"Oh what have you got there sweetie?" I heard mommy's voice and Freddie spun the two of us around to face her, my head immediately lifting up.

"Teddy!" I replied proudly, holding it out in front of me for her to get a good look.

"Oh that looks nice, and are you going to watch a movie as well?" she asked me, noticing the DVD box in Uncle Freddie's hand.

"Yeah, The Little Mermaid!" I replied with a smile, hugging the bear to my chest once again.

"Wow that sounds fun!" she told me, before turning to Freddie, "Mind if I go get something to eat?" she asked and he just nodded his head before Mom headed into the kitchen.

"Let's get this movie on for you then!" Freddie told me, walking me over to the TV and turning it on, as he placed the disk in the player at the same time.

"Do you want to sit on the sofa or on the chair?" Freddie asked me and this was when I became aware that I'd been in his arms since we'd arrived. I pointed to the sofa and he placed me down onto it, smiling at me.

"Can I keep Ru-Ru bear?" I asked him shyly, forgetting what he'd called the bear when I'd first noticed him.

"Sure you can!" he told me, pressing play on the movie just as mommy returned from the kitchen and sat down on the table as she ate a sandwich. Uncle Freddie went and sat with her and they began speaking in hushed tones.

I was unable to concentrate on the first half of the movie, I was aware that something really bad must have happened as they both kept looking in my direction. At one point mommy even cried as Freddie comforted her, in my life I'd never seen mommy cry before and this made me upset. I made my eyes turn to the TV in order to attempt to block out my upset mommy, I was still unable to concentrate on the film.

Suddenly I felt the couch beside me dip and looked from the film to see Freddie sat beside me and mommy was no where to be seen.

"Mommy?" I asked quietly, I didn't like that mommy kept disappearing.

"Don't worry, your mom is just gone to take a shower. But I do want to talk to you." He told me, I turned on the sofa to listen to him as he paused the film.

"Me and your mom are aware that you are a smart girl and that you probably know that something bad happened tonight." Freddie told me and I nodded my head, looking down at the bear still sat on my knee.

"Now it makes Mommy sad when she talks about it so she asked Uncle Freddie to tell you, because I don't think you'd like to see mommy cry would you?" I nodded my head again at this statement.

"So, tonight mommy and daddy had a big fight and realised that they don't want to be together anymore!" Freddie told me, his tone of voice was gentle.

"Is it like my friend Hannah's parents? Hannah goes to my pre-k and her parents didn't love each other anymore either so she said they got a specially thingy that meant they weren't married anymore and her and her mommy went to live with her grandma!" I told him, looking up from my lap, the only problem for me and mommy was that we didn't have a grandma to live with.

"Yeah, this is similar to your friend Hannah's parents; but instead of living with your grandma you and mammy are going to live here for abit." Freddie told me.

"What about daddy? Does he not love me anymore either?" I asked Freddie, worried about the answer I'd receive.

"Oh no, of course he still loves you sweetie. Who couldn't love you, just because your mommy and daddy don't want to be together anymore it doesn't mean they don't love you any less." Freddie told me, I nodded my head, still feeling slightly uncertain about this whole situation.

"So were you enjoying your movie?" he asked me, clearly wanting to change the subject.

"I wasn't really watching the movie, me and mommy normally watch movies together and it was not right watching it without her!" I told him, looking back down at the teddy.

"Well, why don't we wait till mommy gets out the shower and then we can all watch it together before it gets to your bedtime?" he asked me, I nodded my head liking the sound of this.

"And while we wait for mommy how about you and I play with your dollies. Mommy said you enjoy playing with your dollies!" Freddie said, a smile spread across my face and I nodded my head. Freddie stood from the sofa and offered me his hand as he directed me over to the table, where two of my dollies were waiting.

* * *

**A/N: so basically, this is suppose to be Sam's daughter remembering, so if the language seems abit to advanced for a 5 year old that's why, and also this story won't just be set in this time zone, they'll be loads of time zones throughout this story. However I won't skip from a time zone at her age of 5, to 22 and then back to 5. The time zones will be in chronological order.**


	2. Chapter 2: Pink Paint

Freddie had helped mom set up one of his two guest rooms into a place for me to sleep, and mom had taken the other guest room. Mom had also been and visited daddy, I don't know what happened in the visit but when she returned she had more of both of our stuff and told me that I'd be able to see dad soon.

So as I had been for the past 3 days I woke up in my new room, it wasn't anything like my old bedroom. The walls were painted white, unlike my previously pink walls, the bed sheets were plain white as well. The only thing that made it more homely was my toys that were scattered all around the floor.

I climbed out my bed and walked out of my bedroom into the small hallway which leads to the lounge area. I could already see mom and Uncle Freddie having the breakfast at the table, they both looked up and smiled at me as I walked over to the table.

"Hey sweetie, what does my growing girl want for her breakfast?" mom asked me as I sat down. The table was square, so Uncle Freddie was on one side, me on another and then mommy opposite Freddie.

"Just some cheerio's please!" I told her, she placed her slice of toast she was half way through and began pouring me a bowl of cereal. Once she'd set it in front of me and I began eating she spoke up once again.

"So babygirl, today mommy needs to go try and get herself a job!" Sam told me, her voice seemed slightly cautious, I just nodded my head as I ate.

"And you won't be able to come with me while I find a job!" she continued, I spoke up between my mouthfuls of cereal.

"Am I spending the day with daddy?" I asked, it was automatic before that whenever mommy was doing something I wouldn't enjoy or wouldn't be welcome to that I'd stay with daddy, but now I was unsure.

"Well sweetie, you know that your daddy has to work at day time!" mom told me.

"Then what's happening to me?" I asked, worried she was going to leave me in the apartment all day by myself.

"Well, Uncle Freddie doesn't have to work today, so will it be ok if you spend the day with him?" she asked me, looking at me worryingly. I most admit I wasn't crazy over spending all day with just Freddie. He was nice and had done stuff with me during the 3 days, but he'd only be here on a night time which wasn't long, what would we actually do for an entire day? But I also knew that mom really needed to find a job.

"Yeah that'll be fine!" I replied as I returned to my cereal, both mom and Freddie gave out what seemed like sighs of relief.

Once I had finished breakfast mom told me to go get changed while she went and got ready to go find a job and Freddie cleaned the dishes since he was already dressed. I decided to wear my favourite pair of jeans, they'd been a Christmas present last year of mommy's other friend Carly. They were just normal blue coloured jeans, but they had a pink flower pattern up the left leg. Mommy always told me I was such a girl compared to her when she was younger since I liked all things pink and mommy said that was a yucky colour. I also wore my yellow butterfly top which was one of my favourites.

Like the good girl mommy had taught me to be, I picked up my now discarded pyjamas and placed them under my pillow, before tucking Rupert Bear, who was lying on the floor, back into the bed. Freddie had said I could keep him for comfort and I'd been sleeping with him ever since.

I walked back into the living area where Freddie was still cleaning up.

"Hey, you can watch the TV for abit while I get the house cleaner and then we'll se what we can do for the day!" he told me with the kind smile he always wore. I nodded my head as I picked up the remote from the usual place and sat down on the sofa, the TV was already on and I guessed him and mom had probably been watching it earlier.

"Does this look okay?" Mom asked from behind, I turned round to see her stood in the doorway looking very unmom like. She wore a grey skirt and jacket with white short, her hair was tied up in a bun and she had black heels on her feet.

"Yeah, I'd hire you if you came looking for a job from me!" Uncle Freddie replied, I nodded my head to.

"You sure? I didn't want to seem to overdressed." Mommy exclaimed, walking into the living area.

"Yeah trust me, they like it when you wear clothes like that because it shows you're willing to be a business women, they'd be nothing worse than someone rolling up in jeans and tee to a job interview." Freddie replied, heading quickly into the kitchen to return the cereals and drinks to there rightful place.

"Okay, so I've got three job interviews today, one at your company and then two for those other officers. That's the good thing about living in New York, there's plenty of officers." Mommy started rambling on, to no one in particular as she grabbed her purse from the chair.

"Now be a good girl for Freddie, make sure you don't do anything to messy or loud for him!" Mommy told me as she looked at me, I nodded my head.

"Don't worry, I had to deal with you through my childhood, if I got through that and survived and can managed a day with a Puckett daughter, and besides, your nice and sweet!" Freddie replied as he walked back into the living area.

"Okay, well I best be off, come and give me a kiss goodbye Lydia." She told me, I jumped up form the sofa to give her a kiss on the cheek. Once I'd give her a kiss I sat back down to watch TV as she straightened out her skirt again.

"Well wish me luck!" she exclaimed, crossing her fingers at the same time.

"Honestly you'll do fine, I've give in a good word with my boos so I'm 99% certain you'll get that job, you managed to get the job at the pear store when we were younger and it's the same company so just be yourself and you'll do fine!" Freddie told my mom, ushering her to the door, she shouted another quick bye to me before she left. Freddie came and sat beside me on the sofa after he closed the door.

"So, I was wondering that since we had a full day just the two of us we could maybe go and buy you some new stuff for your bedroom, make it more like your own. Your mom said you like the colour pink so we could buy some pink paint to paint your walls and some other stuff if you'd like." Freddie asked me, I liked that idea very much. I'd even asked mom when we first came to Freddie's if I ever could get pink walls but she said that'd it was Freddie's house and we wouldn't be staying her in definite so probably not.

"Really? Mommy said we wouldn't be staying here forever and I'd not be allowed pink walls." I told him, turning round on the sofa so I was facing him instead of the telly.

"Well yeah you won't be staying here forever, but while you are I though you'd like a pink room and then it'll always be your bedroom if you ever need come back here!" he told me, "So, if Uncle Freddie just goes and get's ready do you want to go?" he asked me and I nodded my head eagerly, he quickly got back up off the couch an retreated back to his bedroom.

He returned around 5 minutes later and asked me if I was ready to go, I'd been a good girl while he as getting ready and had already put on my shoes, I'd wore my trainers since they were most comfortable and I didn't know if I'd be walking far.

"It's not very hot out today so why don't you go get yourself a nice warm jacket so you're not too old!" Freddie told me as he pulled on his own jacket, I kept mine in my wardrobe, or at least I think that's where mommy put her jacket. I ran to my room and began searching for my favourite jacket that kept me nice and warm but was unable to find it anywhere. Sadly I picked up my not as warm, purple jacket, maybe mommy had left it at home.

"Hey, wouldn't you rather wear your warmer coat that's on the peg by the front door? It's cold out and we wouldn't want you getting ill!" Freddie told me, pointing over to the peg by the door where my favourite jacket hung, feeling slightly foolish.

"Here, you go get that on and I'll go put this back in your bedroom sweetie." He told me, I nodded, taking off the jacket and handing it over as we both went separate ways, I quickly pulling on the jacket still feeling stupid for not realising.

"Okay then, would you like to get the bus or go by car?" he asked me when he'd returned.

"Oh can we go on the bus!" I asked, I hardly ever got to ride the bus and I always found it exciting.

"Sure, but make sure you keep a hold of my hand at all times because we wouldn't want anything to happen to you!" he told me, extending his hand for me to take. I took it, it felt kind of strange, and I'd probably avoid physical contact with Freddie since the first night since I felt awkward after having hugged, cried and clung onto him.

He kept a tight grip on my hand as we walked to catch the bus and kept talking to me about my interests, it didn't take long from his house to the bus stop and it also didn't take long for the bus to show up.

"You go find us a seat while I pay for the tickets!" he told me, the bus wasn't full, just a few old ladies who smiled at me as I headed to the very back of the bus. Freddie following me about 30 seconds later. Taking a seat beside me as I stood up and watched the passing life from the back window, I don't know what fascinated me about the bus; it just always had been the same.

It was a fairly long journey, I'd estimate about half an hour, but the bus eventually stopped at the place we needed to get off, I took hold of Uncle Freddie's hand again so I didn't get lost as he took me to where I guessed the paint shop would be. But as we were heading there Uncle Freddie almost collided with none other than.

"DADDY!" I squealed excitedly, a huge smile on my face as I left go of Freddie and practically jumped into his open arms.

"Hey princess, what you doing out?" he asked me, smiling at me as Freddie stood awkwardly off to the side.

"Uncle Freddie's taking me out to buy some paint so I can decorate my new bedroom!" I told him, I still had a huge smile on my face, I know that sometimes daddy scares me when he argues with mommy and that I don't always feel safe with him, but he's still my daddy and that means I'll always love him.

"Oh really, so that's where your living now!" he replied, I nodded my head, "So where's mommy?" he then asked me.

"She's gone out to try and get a job, because she said she needs to start earning money!" I told him, as he placed me back down on the ground.

"So she left you with a stranger all day!" he said, send dangers Freddie's way.

"Don't be silly daddy, Uncle Freddie isn't a stranger, him and mommy are best friends and we live with him." I told daddy, confused as to why daddy thought Uncle Freddie was a stranger.

"Well darling, daddy needs to get going, I've got to go back to work. But I will see you soon!" he told me, waving bye before continuing to walk down the street, knocking into Freddie as he walked past.

"Come on then, let's go get you some paint!" he told me, holding out his hand for me to take once more as we continued on to the paint shop.

It wasn't much further and we arrived quickly, there were cool trollies which had seats.

"You want to sit in the seat or walk holding onto the trolley?" Freddie asked me as he pulled one from the long row they were all in.

"Sit please!" I replied, he picked me up and carefully sat me in the seat, making sure I was in securely before we entered the shop. I'd never been here before, since mommy had painted my old bedroom when I was still a baby.

It was basically like a huge warehouse that contained everything to do with decorating, there were bathrooms, kitchens and bedrooms displayed. Rows upon rows of carpets wallpaper and paint. It completely fascinated me.

Freddie took us over to the paint section first; there was an entire half of the wall dedicated to different colours of pink. I hadn't actually realised that you could get more than one pink before.

"So, we can either paint your bedroom walls all one colour, or we can paint them two different colours, or if you'd like we can get some wallpaper and decorate them that way!" Freddie told me, stopping the trolley at the pink section.

I wasn't sure what I wanted, I liked the idea of wallpaper, but in a few years I will likely not enjoy that pattern. With paint, yeah it's slightly more boring, but you can easily hang things and take things down.

"I think I'd like two paints best!" I told him, with a shy smile. I was still feeling shy around him, It felt slightly weird asking him for stuff when he wasn't actually related to me. I know he'd offered but still, I didn't want to seem greedy.

"Okay, what colours do you want. You can have two different pinks, a pink and another colour, or you could not have any pink whatsoever." He replied with a smile. Out the corner of my eye I spotted a tin of paint, the colour of pink was bright pink colour, and it looked amazing. My old bedroom the walls had been a baby pink, but this pink was like Barbie's lipstick.

Freddie followed my gaze to the paint tin,

"Do you like that colour?" he asked me, I nodded my head, still looking at the tin. He smiled and reached up and got down two tins of paint and placing them in the trolley.

"Would you like another pink or a totally new colour?" he then asked me, I finally brought my gaze back from the colour and to Freddie once more.

"I really like the colour yellow as well!" I told him with a smile.

"Let's go look at the yellow paints then!" he smiled, as he started pushing the trolley again. We rounded the corner and I spotted none other than my very best friend.

"Matty!" I yelled excitedly, he turned and saw me and began waving enthusiastically. Freddie stopped pushing the trolley as Matty as his mommy walked over.

"Hey Le Le!" he exclaimed once they reached the shopping trolley, his mommy extending her arm out to shake Freddie's.

"What you doing here Matty!" I asked him.

"I drew on one side of my bedroom walls and mommy got mad and sad it looks messy, so we need to get some more paint to paint over it." He told me with a smile, "What are you doing here Le?" he asked me.

"I need paint as well. My mommy and daddy have just decided they no longer love each other so me and mommy have moved in with Uncle Freddie and I need some new paint for my new bedroom walls!" I told him, Matty and his mommy looked slightly taken back by this.

"So you're Sam's brother, I never knew she had one!" his mommy finally spoke up, addressing Freddie.

"No silly, Uncle Freddie is mommy's best friend forever!" I told her.

"She just calls me Uncle Freddie because I'm close with the family!" Freddie exclaimed to Matty's mommy. Was that really why I called him Uncle Freddie? Mommy had just always told me he was Uncle Freddie, and up until a couple of days ago I'd barely seen Freddie and wouldn't have said he was close to us.

It was 6 hours later when the door finally opened and mommy walked into the apartment, placing the key Freddie had given her on the side table and shouting an hello.

"In my room Mommy!" I replied, once we'd got home from paint shopping Uncle Freddie said we could start painting the walls. He had covered the cupboards, my bed, my teddies and my carpet with some old sheets and dressed me in one of his old shirts. Like mommy I was small, smaller than the average 5 year old, and this meant that Freddie's shirt buried me, stopping half way down my leg.

By now we'd completed one wall of pink, and we were half way through the wall opposite. Uncle Freddie said it'd be best to do the two pink walls first and then the yellows walls tomorrow or Saturday, because it'd be easier to paint walls next to each other when one wall is dry.

We were both covered in paint, mainly me, I had it in my hair, on my skin and there's no way Freddie would ever be able to wear the shirt again. Mommy walked into the bedroom and gasped at the site.

"Look mommy, where painting!" I exclaimed, holding up the wet paint brush and shaking it. Mommy jumped out the way to make sure she didn't get hit by the paint. But Freddie didn't managed to get out the way in time and now he was splattered in even more paint.

"Yes I see that honey but why are we painting?" she asked looking at Freddie for an answer, I knew she'd want him to reply so I just began getting more paint on the brush.

"I though she deserved a room she felt was her own, and if I was her age I'd have been bored with plain white walls. So I remembered you saying she liked pink so I thought I'd let her get some pink paint for her bedroom walls. It give us something to do today and hasn't caused any harm." He told mommy as I began to apply the paint to the walls.

"What about when we move out, you'll have a pink spare bedroom!" Mom told him.

"It takes nothing to paint once more, anyway, how'd the job hunting go?" he asked, I looked up too. I know this was an important matter.

"I think it went okay, they all said they'd get in touch with me in a couple of days, so fingers crossed!" she said, crossing her fingers at the same time.

"Well why don't you come and paint with us two and have some fun mommy!" I asked, going back to my painting spot.

"Oh go on then, I'll just go get into some old clothes." She exclaimed, exiting the bedroom.

* * *

**A/N: I know this chapter doesn't have much seddie, but as the chapters progress they will be more, and the relationship between Lydia and Freddie will get more comfortable and less shy.**

**So hopefully you enjoyed this, and I gotta say thanks so much for 6 reviews on my last chapter, I never expected to get so many. So thank you, and please review this chapter as well.**


	3. Chapter 3: Christmas Tree

Christmas was always my favourite time of year, ever since I was a very small baby. I loved everything about it, the decorations, the presents, the food, the family get together; and this Christmas was no exception.

I'd started the big school this fall and I was due to star in the Christmas play tonight and I was nervous. I was playing one of the singing Christmas trees, along with 5 others and the thought of all those people watching me wasn't pleasant.

I left my bedroom and walked into the living room, the TV wasn't on but there was music coming from somewhere. I could see Mommy, she was sat on one of the table chairs with one of those model statues set out in front of her. It was wearing my dark green dress, which was my costume for tonight's play, and mom was sewing on a few final accessories.

She'd spent weeks trying to make sure I had the best costume, and it had really paid off. She'd made me some red tinsel bracelets, and sewn on the same red tinsel around the bottom of my dress and the neck line. She'd then sewn on silver tinsel in a zigzag pattern around the dress and also sewn on all sorts of beads in all sizes to make it look like lights and ornaments. She'd also borrowed two rather large tree ornaments from her works Christmas tree and she'd attached them to fake earring clips so I could wear them on my ears. Along with the dress, I had some bright green tights, which Uncle Freddie had found at a shop while doing his Christmas shopping, and some dark green shoes that where almost the same colour as my dress and had glitter all over them.

Finally, mommy and Uncle Freddie had managed to make me a head accessory, mom had bought a plain white head band and had stuck on even more beads and glitter, while Freddie made a big golden star from some plastic he got at work, and once that was stuck on it looked like the star on top of the tree.

"Hey baby girl, you'll never guess what Freddie managed to borrow from this girl at work!" Mommy exclaimed, looking up at me as I walked in.

"What?" I asked, curious as to what it could be, although I guess it would likely be something for my costume because otherwise I'd be kept for me to open as a present on Christmas Day.

"This cool hair colour streakier, she said she uses it on her daughter all the time because she loves different colours in her hair, so when she said it had green that could be added to the hair I thought of you baby girl and how amazing your little brunette curls will look with green running through them!" she told me with a smile, wow that sounded cool. Mommy really wanted me to be the best Christmas tree.

"Oooh cool, all the others Christmas tree's will be so jealous!" I told her as I took a seat on the sofa, but one of my favourite Christmas songs began playing through the speakers so I jumped up again and began to sing and dance while Mommy continued the finally pieces to my costume.

"_Oh I wish it could be Christmas everyday!" _I sang loudly, it was the only part of the song I knew, as I jumped up and down. Uncle Freddie came into the living room at this point, walking over and beginning to dance to. I don't know why but I immediately stuck out my arms out to be lifted up; I think it was a reflex from those times daddy had been cheerful at Christmas and danced with me. He would always pick me up and dance for a song with me on his hip just been silly, I kind of missed Daddy; I hadn't seen him in months, not since we ran into him when going to get paint. Mommy always said he was busy but I'd see him soon, but soon never came.

Uncle Freddie picked me up with no hesitation and sat me on his hip, as we began bouncing around the room we sang at the top of our voices. Freddie knew more words than me, but I practically shouted at the top of my lungs when I knew the words. By the time the song was finished we both were out of breathe, but the next song on was another one of my favourites, and I think Freddie sensed this because instead of putting me down like I thought he would he began dancing again. Singing loudly once more.

"_SO HERE IT IS MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYBODY'S HAVING FUN!" _we sang, by the time this song was over we were officially worn out, Uncle Freddie fell back into the sofa with me as the next song was a slow song, unfamiliar to me.

"So you all ready for your performance as a Christmas Tree tonight?" he asked me as we began to gain back our breathes, we remained on the sofa, me sat on top of Uncle Freddie with his arms wrapped around me.

"Yeah, I've learnt the song and dance and mommy has made me the perfect costume. I'm really excited, are you coming to watch me Uncle Freddie?" I asked him, looking up at him.

"Of course I'm coming; I couldn't miss watching you be the best Christmas tree ever!" Freddie answered me with a smile.

"Me and Freddie will be sat at the front row watching your every moment." Mommy said from the side.

"What about daddy? Will he be there?" I dared to ask, I immediately felt Freddie stiffen up underneath me and mommy's head rose up to look at me.

"Sorry baby, but you know how busy daddy can get and he's really busy today. But we'll record your whole performance and we can show that to daddy!" Mommy told me.

"Oh, okay!" I replied softly, to be honest I knew daddy wouldn't be there.

"I know baby girl, why don't you go get your new Christmas colouring book and you and Uncle Freddie can colour some pictures to give to everyone when we go back to Seattle for Christmas!" mommy told me, I nodded my head and jumped off Uncle Freddie and made my way into my bedroom to find my book.

I admit, I felt sad that daddy wasn't coming to see me perform, but I hadn't expected him too. I was beginning to wonder if he didn't want to see me again. I walked into my bedroom to search for my book, pushing daddy to the back of my mind.

I loved my new bedroom; mommy, uncle Freddie and me had all decorated it. With yellow and pink painted walls, I also had a pink carpet and my bed had Barbie princess covers. They'd also bought me a lilac coloured canopy to hang over my bed, so when I was asleep I felt like I was in a princess castle.I also had posters, pictures and my drawings pinned on the walls.

I loved having loads of pictures hung up, mommy always liked to take plenty so I had loads. I had many with my two best friends Matty and Em, I also had many of me and mommy, and me and daddy and some of all 3 of us. And then recently, I had some photos with Uncle Freddie. We'd been on a few trips the three of us, mainly just for a picnic in the park, but we'd also been to the beach a few times.

I grabbed my colouring book and crayons before leaving my room once more, but as I walked down I heard mommy and Uncle Freddie talking in hushed tones; curiosity getting the better of me I decided to sneak a listen to there conversation.

"Did you actually invite him?" Uncle Freddie asked mommy.

"Of course I invited him; he's her father for god sake. But he said he didn't want to come, he said he wouldn't come to anything if you were there. He already things we were having an affair before I left!" Mommy replied.

"Well then I won't go, that way her dad can go!" Uncle Freddie exclaimed, sitting down at the table. I wanted Uncle Freddie there, but if that meant daddy could come then maybe I'd be okay with him not coming.

"I couldn't go and be with him on my own, and anyway, you and I both know he still wouldn't go. You're just an excuse, honestly I think the next time Le will see his face will be when he needs something from her. You know what kind of guy he is Freddie, you always warned me about him in college and I never listened and now he doesn't want anything to do with his own daughter just because I left him!" Mommy told him, stopping her sewing for a minute.

"You can't blame yourself for not leaving there sooner Sammy, the important thing is that you have left now!" Uncle Freddie spoke, standing up and moving round to Mom to give her a hug; was daddy a bad person?

"I know, but I can't help thinking how much better my life would have been if I'd just listened to you and Carly instead of sticking round for so long!" mommy told him, wrapping her arms round him, a few tears escaping her eyes.

"Don't think like that, you've got to see the positives sides. Like if you'd left him straight away then you wouldn't have Lydia, and she's the most important thing in your life. Wouldn't it be awful without her here?" Uncle Freddie told mommy, I hope she'd say yes.

"Of course she is, I couldn't imagine my life without her, I just wish she didn't have to have him as her father. She deserves someone who loves her and cares for her, not someone who uses her because he wants to try get me back. Remember that day I went and got our stuff back form him, I told him he could see Le anytime he wanted and all he said was _I'll see her when you come back, and otherwise I want nothing to do with either of you two. _That's how awful he is Freddie; she's his daughter for fuck sake!" Mommy was crying heavily now, and I knew she must be angry because she never said swear words, that was just daddy who said them.

Uncle Freddie was trying to calm her down, he still had his arms wrapped around her as he lifted her from the seat, sat in it himself and brought her down onto his lap, the same way mommy does to me when I'm upset over something.

"Come on Sammy, calm down, he's not worth any of this upset or anger. I know the world seems crap right now, but it's going to get better. You will find someone who actually loves you and cares about you, who will love Lydia like he's his own. You don't need him, and you never will." Uncle Freddie exclaimed rubbing mommy's back with his hand. Mommy's tears began to subside and she claimed down, grabbing a tissue from the side to wipe her eyes with.

"Thanks for been here!" mommy told Freddie, her voice even quieter.

"What are best friends for" he chucked in reply, giving her a quick squeeze. Then it all happened really quickly, suddenly mommy was kissing Uncle Freddie, and not like the other times where she's kissed his cheek, but right on the lips. They seemed to kiss for about 3 seconds before they both realised what was happening and pulled apart, mom leaping up from Freddie's lap and almost crashing into the dress model in the process.

"Sorry!" mom mumbled to him.

"It's alright," he whispered back, standing up from the seat for mommy to sit back down. She sat in it without making eye contact with him.

"Lydia, have you found your colouring book yet?" she then shouted as she began to get back to work, I guessed that was my cue to come back into the living room, although I would not be letting them know I'd heard and seen everything. But I'm glad I did listen, because now I know the real reason why I don't see daddy.

* * *

I was on next and my nerves were getting the best of me, I was certain I was going to throw up or worse, forget my lines and dance. Mom had made my costume amazingly, and even the teacher had complemented it greatly. My hair had the green running through it and mom had also used her special curling irons to make my looser curls tighter and cuter.

The act before the Christmas tree's finished and I felt a thick lump in my throat as the reindeers all trampled off the stage. Matty, who was a reindeer, caught my eye as I stood up and he went to take a seat and gave me a thumbs up as a good luck sort of sign. I walked on stage and took my place beside my partner Katie; I spotted mommy who was sat in the second row, smiling up at me like any proud mother. I spotted Uncle Freddie, who'd moved to crouch down in the isle, holding his camera ready to film my performance. He caught my eye and gives me a big smile as well, and seeing everyone I loved having faith in me just give me the urge to be good, and swallow my fears and nerves.

I managed to get through the performance without a hitch, I managed to remember all my moves and song lyrics; I walked up to front, my hand in Katie and James' as all us Christmas Trees took a bow, I spotted mommy and Freddie clamping wildly and I'm sure mommy wolf whistled once as a joke. We walked back off stage and sat in our seats, Matty turning round and giving me another thumbs up.

We were one of the last acts of the night, so soon enough the show was over and we were been taken back to the classroom to collect out stuff and wait for our parents to show up. Mommy wasn't long, and she showed up with big open arms for a hug, picking me up and embracing me even tighter.

"She was an amazing Christmas Tree!" my teacher said coming up to mommy, and shaking hands with Freddie who had appeared beside mom.

"She was our little star!" mommy replied as she set me back down, I moved over to Freddie who held his arms out for a hug too, I hugged him too as he lifted me off my feet and sat me on his hip. The teacher smiled before heading to speak to some other parents.

"That was amazing baby girl!" mommy told me, tickling my tummy slightly, but probably not hard enough so I didn't accidently kick Freddie or something.

"Did you get it all on camera?" I asked them, not to either one specifically.

"We did, wait till everyone see's how excellent you were at Christmas!" Freddie replied as mommy picked up my bag which contained the clothes I'd wore to come, she clearly wasn't making me change.

"Well come on you two, how about we head to the car; and since you were such an amazing Christmas Tree we'll stop by and get you an ice cream from McDonalds. I nodded my head eagerly as we headed outside towards Freddie's car, and as I leaned my head on his shoulder all thoughts on my dad and their accidently kiss were momentarily gone from my head.

* * *

**A/N: sorry it took a while to update, but hopefully this isn't a disappointment, and remember, review to give me inspiration and make me want to write more **


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